Monday, August 11, 2014

Super moon

Last night was the Super Moon.  I watched the moon rise over the Sandias with my parents.  It was actually an emotional experience thinking about last year's super moon and how much has changed, happened, grown and fell away.   Even though the dates are not the same, it felt like some sort of anniversary, marking an event instead of a date.  

Last year the morning of the super moon, Adam met our teacher.  I had been studying with him for a little while and while we were in a private yoga session, the topic of the super moon meditaion, lead by our teacher came up.  Adam was kind of interested in going to the meditation, and I was hesitant because it would be a late night, and I had work in the morning.   However when we went to breakfast, it was a huge coicidence that we ran into my teacher.  I remember asking Adam if he wanted to meet him, and Adam saying "sure I'll meet him someday."   So I just asked "What about now?  He is right over there."

That brief introduction changed something, because Adam was suddenly excited to go to the Super Moon meditation that night.  So we went, and a couple months later Adam started studying with the same teacher.  

Honestly, it felt strange last night talking to Adam as he drove to the meditation.  I felt alone, about an hour later watching the moon rise I no longer felt alone or isolated.  

I think about that little exchange Adam and I had a lot.  The entire idea of "someday,"  someday I will do the thing I want.  How often do we put off something til "someday."   The reality is the opportunity might be right in front of me, I can chose if I want to walk through the door, I can chose if I am present enough to notice it, and I need to take all those tiny steps to seize the moment.  So what happens if I miss a cue, and don't walk on stage?   My question now, is how do I even know it was a cue?  Maybe it just wasn't the moment.

As I was falling asleep one of my friends posted on facebook, that it was the two year anniversary of her IVF transfer.  She posted photos of the cells next to her adorable toddlers.  It was a little startling to think that it was two years ago that we went through cycles at the same time, with very different results.   I didn't miss my cue, it wasn't my cue, it wasn't my moment for things to work out the way "I" wanted.  Things worked out perfectly for both of us during that time, and my faith continues that things will always work out perfectly.   I love seeing the photos of her toddlers and hearing about their growth, and I love my life of exploration. 

Question to consider: What triggers memories for you, dates, places, or events?  When is the last time you watched the moon rise?

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