Friday, January 16, 2015

The Sun

The sun came out yesterday!  It was this magnificent moment in yoga class, when things brightened up and everyone let out a sigh of relief, basking in the sunlight!   It was feeling pretty cold and gloomy here in Houston, and my energy was super low.   Desspite that fact I continued to push myself and continue to set up meetings with people and work on yoga classes.  However as the sky darkened, I had wanted to stay home and curl up in bed with the pup and rest.

I started to feel stressed, as my planner continued to fill up and my energy dropped.  So I walked out of class this morning at 8 AM, not really wanting to drive downtown to look into teaching classes at an outreach center downtown.   I sat in my car for a while, mapping the drive and attempting to figure out what the parking situation might be like.   Then I simply decided I was being a little silly, I would find out the parking situation when I got there, I just needed to dive in.

All of these meetings and requests are exactly what I asked for, I asked to be more involved in the community, I asked for people to help, I asked to learn how to be a healer.  Now I get to figure out what programs are a fit for me and which ones are not.  The only way I will figure it out is to get out of my head and get out there.

So I introduced myself in class today and the instructor immediately spoke up and asked me to lead a guided meditation at the end of class.  (That was the moment, the moment I could chose "yes" or "no.")   I said "yes,"  then immediately the butterflies started in my stomach, and I quickly decided to enjoy those butterflies, and still do my work.   

I am talking to a group of about 30 people next week about what I do, to see if they want me to teach them qigong, yoga and meditation.   Those butterflies are small and everyday they get a bit biggger.  Mostly I hear them say "you are not enough."  Time to make friends with those butterflies too and let their wings carry me through that talk as well!

Question to consider:  What gives you "butterflies?"  The good butterflies and the bad butterflies?  Maybe it is all related.   I love teaching, and am not fond of public speaking.  

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